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Image of cupid and heartNot everyone using online dating sites is looking for love. Scammers create fake online profiles using photos of other people — even stolen pictures of real military personnel. They profess their love quickly. And they tug at your heartstrings with made-up stories about how they need money — for emergencies, hospital bills, or travel. Why all of the tricks? They’re looking to steal your money.

As if all that isn’t bad enough, romance scammers are now involving their victims in online bank fraud. Here’s how it works: The scammers set up dating profiles to meet potential victims. After they form a “relationship,” they come up with reasons to ask their love interest to set up a new bank account. The scammers transfer stolen money into the new account, and then tell their victims to wire the money out of the country. Victims think they’re just helping out their soulmate, never realizing they’re aiding and abetting a crime.  

Here are some warning signs that an online love interest might be a fake. They ask you to:

  • chat off of the dating site immediately, using personal email, text, or phone
  • wire money using Western Union or Money Gram
  • set up a new bank account

Did you know you can do an image search of your love interest’s photo in your favorite search engine? If you do an image search and the person’s photo appears under several different names, you’re probably dealing with a scammer. And if the person’s online profile disappears a few days after they meet you, that’s another tip-off.

Here’s the real deal: Don’t send money to someone you met online — for any reason. If your online sweetheart asks for money, you can expect it’s a scam.

Unfortunately, online dating scams are all too common. There may be tens of thousands of victims, and only a small fraction report it to the FTC. If this happens to you, please report it at ReportFraud.ftc.gov.

A woman looking at a dating site on her computer.

Search Terms
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Topics
Shopping and Donating
Scams
Romance Scams

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The purpose of this blog and its comments section is to inform readers about Federal Trade Commission activity, and share information to help them avoid, report, and recover from fraud, scams, and bad business practices. Your thoughts, ideas, and concerns are welcome, and we encourage comments. But keep in mind, this is a moderated blog. We review all comments before they are posted, and we won’t post comments that don’t comply with our commenting policy. We expect commenters to treat each other and the blog writers with respect.

  • We won’t post off-topic comments, repeated identical comments, or comments that include sales pitches or promotions.
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  • We won’t post threats, defamatory statements, or suggestions or encouragement of illegal activity.
  • We won’t post comments that include personal information, like Social Security numbers, account numbers, home addresses, and email addresses. To file a detailed report about a scam, go to ReportFraud.ftc.gov.

We don't edit comments to remove objectionable content, so please ensure that your comment contains none of the above. The comments posted on this blog become part of the public domain. To protect your privacy and the privacy of other people, please do not include personal information. Opinions in comments that appear in this blog belong to the individuals who expressed them. They do not belong to or represent views of the Federal Trade Commission.

smalltownhick
June 12, 2018

In reply to by Telling It Real

Telling It Real we know we have been scammed, but talking about it helps us heal and if we can save others from making the same mistake we have then it is the best we can do. We just want others to be aware while we move on and heal
Know I'm talki…
April 30, 2018
How do I do the picture recognition finder? Meaning I have his pic and I want to see if it's being used any where else. As well as being able to copy parts of his emails and see if it's been used before. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks!
Keepdreaming666
May 01, 2018
Have any of the guys you ladies have been talking too send you gifts to your home?
RealRenae
January 28, 2022

In reply to by Keepdreaming666

Yes he said he sent me a love gift and I am to pay for it to be shipped to my home address . I am currently dealing with a scammer...... I am embarrassed by the fact that I sent him money and nothing was forthcoming as he said, I should have yielded my pastor's advice when I told him of the situation
Lovestruck
May 01, 2018
I am talking to a guy says he is a dr david simbali he is in iraq has a 15 year old son named peter in school in uk asked if i could send itune cards to him to help him get food. His so called son called me mom. Says he loves me is wife died in car crash 4 years ago. Wants me to send him iTunes cards so he could come see me.even asked me to open an acct for him so he could get army pension. Promised to take care of me been talking since july2017 even though I have sent nothing to him he still keeps talking to me. He says the sweetest things. Calls me his queen sweetheart I know he is scamming me or trying to. But I have feelings for him. Darn him I wish I could block him and move on but I also wish there was a way to see what he really looks like..
Mickey Mouse
May 02, 2018
Does anyone know a David Mazagatti?
concerned
August 03, 2018

In reply to by Mickey Mouse

I have just been contacted by him through a dating site. Is he a scammer
concerned
August 03, 2018

In reply to by Mickey Mouse

Update: yes this person is definitely a scam artist. I did some research on Facebook and could not validate his actual email the phone he called from his pictures or anything. He created a Facebook profile three days ago under that name they were seven likes to that profile picture and they were all of south African origin. Not from the United States Germany and Australia as he claimed to be from. Stay away from him.
Concerned in Canada
July 06, 2019

In reply to by Mickey Mouse

How about Richard Mazagatti.. Gemologist.. ?
Fish Fry lady
August 29, 2019

In reply to by Concerned in Canada

A Cris Mazagatti reached out to me 2 days ago on a dating site. Says he is a Gemologist. Texted me on a CA land line, but said he lived in Henry, VA. Look out...I'm sure it's probably the same person. He didn't get far enough with me. I figured him out and made him mad. He claimed to be Italian with a Graduate degree, but his grammar/spelling did not reflect and educational of that level. Claimed to be a widow with one daughter.
Don’t be fooled
September 17, 2019

In reply to by Fish Fry lady

Cris also reached out to me on Bumble, total scammer!
Peaches
November 01, 2019

In reply to by Don’t be fooled

He reached out to me on bumble but name was Richard Mazagatti
Peaches
March 16, 2020

In reply to by Concerned in Canada

To Canada yes I know a lot about the name Richard mazagatti the Geologist i would love to talk to you more about him cause I was scam by him he still trying to talk to me. Please reach out to me. I would love to hear your story.
GA Peach
December 12, 2021

In reply to by Peaches

He reached out to me on Zoosk. Same story. When I called him out, he asked why did I send him the comments from this page. I asked him to meet me at Starbucks at 12:30, claims he will show. The thing is, I really do need to go to Starbucks for some Christmas gifts. So it will not be a wasted trip for me.
Ibetiger
May 16, 2018

Not sure if anyone has had a similar experience but I fear my son is being scammed: If Feb he started talking to this girl Woonsen VT AKA - Sukanya Kongcharoen via tender and then moved to FB. She is supposedly in Bangkok.

She has had my 22 yr son lying to me from the get go and has convinced him to come there to her. He has been saving money for this trip and it seems she has given him a timetable. First was 4 months - but just the other night I heard him arguing with her saying you gave me 4 months and now you are saying 2 months and it has only been 2 months that isn't fair. . .

Seems like she is breaking up with him weekly for various reasons including the one 'your mom hates me' He has a friend who's family is from the region and even he says something isnt right with her but my son has fallen hook line and sinker. He has alienated friends, argues with me constantly and if I say anything to him he is flying off the handle relating it to her. She accuses him of cheating and everything is secret - so lots of lies being told. I dont know if she is going to scam him for the money he saved by claiming to be able to get a better deal on a plane ticket for him if he sends her the money or wants to get him to bankok for even worse reasons. She claims to be a model/actress but has no online footprint via name of photo and has multiple FB accounts - here is the one he uses: facebook. com/profile. php?id= 10000xxxxxxxxxx Any help to show him this is a scam would be wonderful!! Thank you!

Matt
May 03, 2018
My mom was just targeted by a scammer. David Richards he said he was an engineer doing work in Turkey and would be back to the states soon. He checked most of the boxes for these online romance scans. He quickly took the conversation to email/text, had a daughter living in the UK, said he sold his house in the area before going overseas but I couldnt find any record of him ever owning the house. He showered on the love and affection talking about marriage. He gave a story about how his laptop broke and asked my mom to send him a new MacBook Pro. She was almost going to do it but he called back and said he needed 2 MacBooks pros. I thought it was strange and told my mom not to send him any kind of money or anything. A week later he claimed someone stole $500k from his bank account and he needed money to renew his work license in Turkey. His english was very bad for someone who claimed to have lived in the US since 1985. I traced his cell phone number he was talking to my mom on by doing a reverse carrier lookup and it came back with Enflick as the carrier which I discovered is related to a website called www. textnow. com/ where you can register a phone number to text and call on the computer for free using any area code you want.
Keepdreaming666
May 03, 2018

In reply to by Matt

Hi Matt, Do you have the phone number that he uses on textnow. I was talking to a guy who only used textnow to send text and call on the phone. Also do you know how old his daughter is?
He loves red roses
May 03, 2018
Met David Miller on Instagram. He sent me a friend request. Does this name sound familiar? We chatted, he sent me a picture, handsome man. Then he wanted to chat on WhatsApp, we did. He had 2 Facebook accounts, same face. We Skyped once, video not clear, couldn't really see if it was him. Kept saying he loves ne over and over. Hes an orthopedic surgeon and is presently in Kabul Afghanistan. He wanted me to sent him an itunes, i said i couldnt do that, he gave me attitude. Does David Miller sound familiar? This is crazy and bizarre.
nowbroken
May 03, 2018

In reply to by He loves red roses

What does he look like? Can you describe? Also, how old do you think he is? Why two Facebook accounts? Was his name the same on both? I am having a terrible time getting over this. We've talked a little since I refused him the money (mostly initiated by me) and he has just talked terrible to me. Told me I don't understand how relationships work and how I need to learn loyalty and devotion and on and on. I almost said "If I send you $5K will you stop being mean to me?" Of course I'm not serious. I would not send him a cent after what has transpired. I'm a generous person, but I'm not a fool.
Spiritinthesky
August 04, 2018

In reply to by He loves red roses

He is currently playing on Words with Friends under the name Bob Owen. Wanted to chat while playing the game and came out with the same story as above plus is a widower with a son. His wife and daughter were killed in a car crash. All started to sound completely fake so ended game!
Suspicious
December 31, 2019

In reply to by He loves red roses

Approached by David Miller. Any way to upload his picture?
Worried
August 08, 2020

In reply to by He loves red roses

Iv just had David Müller surgeon sane. Asked me for money for his tax bill or going to jail. I hope he goes to jail rots. He's just blackmailed me by putting my personal photographs. Up everywhere. All becauseci refuse to bail him out of his mess. But now he's come on with fake name Mason Williams. Stay away from him block him hevis evil. Blackmailer. Threatened my family.
Worried
August 08, 2020

In reply to by He loves red roses

Iv had him try to blackmail me. Even now in 2020.hes still doing same thing scamming people. Iv refused to help him give him any money. For his tax bill. So then threats to show my photos to my family. There only topless. So what. But this lowlife needs arresting.
Cautious4sure
May 03, 2018
Diego Murphy-widowed and has a little girl named Emily in NC. Has anybody heard of him? I met him on Tinder and one day before we were supposed to meet, he said he had to go to Turkey. Now he is stuck in Turkey.
imnotstupid
May 03, 2018
These guys are relentless. I responded to facebook request from "Larry Roland Stone", engineer supposedly from Ohio. We chatted via messenger for a few weeks then moved over to hangout, giving me the typical sweet talk these guys do. Claims he was widow with 13 year old daughter, away at school because he travels so much for work He sounded sincere Long story short, he had to go to Peru for work, was mugged and robbed, in hospital, needed money to finish job, etc etc I didn't send him a dime and blocked him I joined an online dating site since I would like to meet a real man First one I wanted to chat with turned out to be another scammer I knew 3 days into the texting back and forth but played along for 3 weeks when he had to go to Sweden for work, ran into legal problems, was arrested for not paying taxes, took his passport I told him I wasn't giving him a dime, he acted all hurt saying he wasn't asking for money just needed to tell me what happened I told him I wasn't stupid and was just waiting for his story Naturally all the time we were texting and talking everyday he was declaring undying love for me, blah blah blah I immediately blocked him from everything He is going by "Alberto Mario" from Chicago, although he's changed his name by now I'm sure since he also deleted his profile from the dating site a week after we met. LADIES BE SMART, DO NOT SEND ANY MONEY OR PERSONAL INFORMATION, BANK ACCOUNTS, ADDRESSES, ETC These guys are out there looking for new victims every day.
Nondell
May 04, 2018
I've been texting with "Charlie Dwayne Peterson." It's been a month. He professes true everlasting love. Has a daughter who turned 15 yesterday. He turned 66 today. He's in an oil rig off the California coast. He's a widower. He wants me to buy him an iTunes card to update his phone. Says he can't talk on the phone, against the rules. Can't take pictures on the rig. His name doesn't come up anywhere in the web. Says he works for 2 months on this rig every year. Home is Washington D. C. he says but his cell has a Seattle area code. Won't give me address. Any of the familiar?
Deevo-mail
May 25, 2020

In reply to by Nondell

Michael Neumann,but same story. Has a son instead of daughter. Lives in LA, California. Ask for STEAM CARDS. PLEASE IN DEEP RIGHT NOW!
Rollergirl
November 10, 2020

In reply to by Deevo-mail

I hope you've broken free by now, I was in your position & didn't want to believe it was true after 2 yrs I caught him after he pretended to go to jail then hospital & gave me 2 numbers of neighbors to help which were him!
anonymus
May 07, 2018

I am a businesswoman on instagram, keep getting approached by various "followers" with messages. Same lines, most likely same person or ring. Uses the greeting "my dear" claims widow one child "Kelvin" maybe another deceased child. military base lives in a different country than country of origin child my be in a boarding school or (bonding) school in different country than he. Has home in a different country than he or his child or his so called job. One stated looking for wife and mother for child. One shows various pictures of Nuerosurgeon. very good looking, working as a doctor in Syria military hospital base Tishreen. One posing as a military man, another as a military man, one as an Engineer/Contractor UK origin/Ukraine military. All of these asked for nothing ordered no product and were confronted with their lack of authenticity. They are all on Instagram with private accounts. Posing as USA military. is this stock photography or stolen identity? hope they are caught. I can provide some instagram ids.

Foolishly
May 04, 2018
These people are sick
Angel
May 04, 2018
Just a heads up to all of you. The pictures they share are NOT of them ever. The storyline sometimes varys and Rarely are they even in the US. I had a similar story but kept getting red flags. I had a DOD friend so an in depth search and he got the real address, picture and more on the scammer. Working right now with the FBI. He is in Ontario Canada and apparently there is a huge ring who swaps pictures. Shares possible targets with each other and I am contacted now almost on a daily basis with new (obvious) scammers. Clues to spot REAL quick are possibly speak a 2nd language, widowed, looking to marry and working away from the City they listed. Sob stories vary. FYI they will ask you to being chatting thru text, email or talking on a cell. They use a routing program that looks like they are closeby. NOT at all!. Don't be a VICTIM
Falling in love
May 05, 2018
Has anyone heard of Patrick donald in the Navy in Turkey he's hot and he hasn't asked for money do u know if he is real
Concerned Person
August 12, 2020

In reply to by Falling in love

I have the same thing with a guy named Ray Clark in Navy right now in Turkey. If we both have similar situations I would think it was a scam.
Janson
May 05, 2018
Is there any lady who talked with a u s general reserve in Syria with the name Jake Otto Mearson ? He is asking me for a military communication card packege I refused until today because I don t think a real u s general 1 star has no need of this to communicate with bis beloved ones..
GB1030
May 07, 2018

In reply to by Janson

Hello, please take the time to read posts on pages 55. March 22 2018 and on page 53.March 12, 2018. I submitted a description on a scammer with his or her sad story. Your story sounds very familiar. They are both posted under GB1030.
btiedy
May 05, 2018
Has any one been scammed by a man who goes by Adam Cummings, says he’s a network analyst on an assignment in Yemen.
Lizzie
May 05, 2018
I been reading a lot of these posts from March April May of this year 2018 This guy claiming to be in the United States Air Force military say he’s a sergeant major and he does police patrol training He told me he’s lives in California I asked what part he said Los Angeles he sent a friend request to Facebook and that’s how I met this guy and he also had a Hangouts account we talked and texted everyday he sent me a lot of pictures and even videos of him working out in the gym he’s very attractive beautiful smile and knows what to say He also a widow says his wife passed away a couple years ago of cancer he has two daughters this man name is Donald he started asking for iTunes cards so he could stay in contact with me then he started asking for money to come home from the military because he missed his daughters and claimed he miss me to said he needed 1250 to come home and wanted iTunes cards so he could sell them because other soldiers was asking him about the cards I told him no so he started treating me and blackmail me that he was going to send nude pictures of me to my friends family on Facebook and send nude pictures to my work place and even church if I wouldn’t help him home so I blocked him off my Facebook page and I also had to delete my Hangouts account because he kept making threats to me He’s still on social media Hangouts and Instagram he has pictures in his uniform and I’m regular clothes he dresses very well he says in in Syria with Air Force but I don’t believe who he says he is he told me his name Lenihan Donald Clark Sgt.Major Clark this man I believe have scam a lot of women out of money and cards please don’t be fooled by a beautiful smile nice body and lovely words the devil is busy working if any come across this name Lenihan Donald Clark be cautious because he’s not who he say he is looking for single woman to prey on I hope these post help other women out there that have been scammed and being blackmail please be aware and report them
GB1030
May 07, 2018

In reply to by Lizzie

Hello Lizzie, please read the description on page 55, posted by GB1030 on March 22, 2018. Also on page 53 posted March 12,2018. You story sound very familiar. I gave a discretion of the picture use in the scam.
Concerned Person
August 12, 2020

In reply to by Lizzie

There is a guy named Ray Clark supposedly in Navy in Turkey and his birthday happens to be tomorrow. He contacted me 2 days ago on Instagram and then he asked to use Whatsapp. I am still researching him, but I believe it is a scam. He asked me to go to Walmart and get a card for music because he loves music and misses it. I am so on to him. Just waiting for my research to be done to finally close out my app.
Deborah68
May 05, 2018
I just had another experience with a scammer. His name is Bernard Lowery. We have talked for a short time and he had already talked about love and marriage. Because of what I have learned from this blog red flags were popping up. This morning he asked for $300 to keep jis cell phone going so er could talk. I said NO NO AND MORE NOS. Later he told me that his sgent psid the $300. Told me how much he loves me. I acted happy that we could still talk and I told him to be honest with me. He said he would prove he was not a scammer. Then he tells me his business partners want to give him a contract to receive and send money to Nigeria. The money would be sent to me via money gram or western union. I would pick it up and send it to Nigeria. This way he could save money for our marriage. I yold jim NO WAY THIS IS ILLEGAL. He begged a little then told me to get lost. I couldn't believe he had the nerve to ask me to do this when I told him no and called him a scammer. Thanks for this blog and Dr. Phil's show. Knowledge is power.
hurt1toomanytimes
May 06, 2018
I recently met a guy on a dating site. I was going thru the messages I had and only 1 stood out. Of course he is so good looking. I read his message and replied back. He returned my message and we started talking. Then he asked me to get off that site and he will remove his since we are now together. We talked for hours a day. He sent me pics of him and his daughter which BTW he is a widow. He is ready for a relationship. We have so much in common and we hit it off great. Always with compliments and sweet poetry. Called me cute little nicknmes. He eventually said he was starting to fall in love with me and I was getting fond of hiim too. I talked briefly on the phone with him. the connection was bad. So we just text each other. He asked what I do for a living and I asked him. He says in real estate and some other business in Africa. So anyways, he was now talking about us eventually getting married, and he said his daughter was happy and wanted to talk to me (text of course). All this time I am taken in by this gorgeous man and we talked a little dirty sometimes. So he was planning on meeting me over the weekend. Well, Friday he said he had bad news. He was called to go to Africa due to some issues with customs. So, we didn't get too meet but he says next weekend. I forgot to mention he has 3 phoone numbers which he had me start texting and calling this other number. He had said that he trusts me already and we spoke of having trust to make a relationship work. He showed me how to do some of what he does. Now he text me from airport and I still haven't heard from him. I had asked him to make a video and he said he did and sent it but I never got it. Sometimes he would not answer my questions about him. All this time I never put the pieces together. So, I started to do some research on him. All his photos he sent me were ok except one and I found a profile on him and it was a send money to Africa deal. The whole time I have been talking to him he has never asked for money "YET". I keep saying maybe he is not a scammer, maybe someone is using this handsome guy's photos. He has done some of the things I found out what to look for. I feel like I fell for this guy whi is in the photo but not the one I been chatting with. I just want to know is he a scammer or just coinidence. The photo I found info on was in 2016. Did he do a 1 time thing or his he using many alias'. Please any advice because I love him well the man in the photo. Helplessly romantic.... I hope to hear from him soon.
Keepdreaming666
May 07, 2018

In reply to by hurt1toomanytimes

Hi, Can you describe what he looks like and if you have pictures of his daughter what she looks like and how old she is?. I am talking to a guys who also has a daughtert too. He also took a job but in Nigeria and now is gaving customs issues with his goods. He also sweet talks to me tells me he is going to marry me and his daughter calls me her mum too. I have several photos of him and I have spoken to him on the phone but never could chat with with via FaceTime? We communicate via hangouts all the time. I also met him on a dating site told me to delete my account if we wanted this relationship to be serious. The only difference is that he told me was that his wife left him as she cheated on him and she took all his money. Please I would like to know if this is the same guy as I am also falling for the guy who is in the picture. Hope to hear from you.
Pudgy
May 10, 2018

In reply to by hurt1toomanytimes

Sounds just like the guy I am talking to.. real estate and is in south Africa now. Using the name Bill Walton
susan in Texas
May 06, 2018
Was recently contacted on messenger by a guy named Allen J Walker. Talking about how pretty my picture was and that I had kind eyes. I’ve been down this road before so first thing I said was I know you are a scammer so leave me alone. But he persisted, said he’s from Houston, single Dad but his son is with a relative in England so he can play soccer there. His Facebook profile was very bare, only 2 friends both women. He had a picture of himself in a car wearing sunglasses but had short greying hair. Said he was an under water pipe engineer getting ready to go in a job in the Black Sea for 90 days. Answered very few of my questions. Once he got on the ship his Facebook profile changed to just scenery and no friends no pictures at all. I asked him why and he said he didn’t know how to use Facebook and his son was helping him with it. Couldn’t send me s picture because his camera on his phone wasn’t working. What kind of engineer doesn’t own a phone that works completely right? I had made it perfectly clear that I am a grandma living in social security and would never send money so he better not ask. But 2 weeks in he says he’s having trouble sending money to his son so could he send it to me and I could send it to his son i England. I blew up at him then blocked him on Messenger and Facebook. I knew this was coming, I guess I was hoping this time I was wrong. Ladies please just do not even answer these guys when they reach out to you. You want a new man? Get a friend to set you up on a date with someone they know or meeet someone at work or church or volunteering where you spend Time. Not on social media. Really how desperate do we have to be to send money for a guy we’ve never met in person ? Just don’t answer their messages.
SUE1210
May 06, 2018
I was also contacted by someone going under the name of John Ramos. Stole pictures of a,service man. Lied and said he had a 13 year old son. Then it was a daughter. He told me some outrageous story about finding money in the Pilipinees and wanting to send it to me in a locked box. I would keep it for him until he got back to the states. I played along. Got all the information. I turned in all the people involved. I hope they all rot in jail. I just got contacted on Instagram today. Another idiot.
Embarrassed
May 06, 2018
Has anyone spoken with Michael Huss- 48 year old dad from Arizona who was an orphan raised by a priest who has died. He married a woman and had two boys. They then got divorced because she was cheating on him and then later died of cancer. Has loved me since day 2 and when he called from his google app he sounded Nigerian and started swearing and threatening because I didn’t believe him. I then blocked him and he sent a DM to my daughter with a picture of me that scared her very much. Telling her your mother better comply or he’ll ruin her family. Has this happened to anyone? He said he was from Arizona and only mentioned receiving a large amount of gold worth millions from the Syrian government as a thank you for protecting them. He stated he declined the gift
fina fina 88
May 07, 2018
hey..i just want to tell u guys what i have been facing lately.this older guy,18 yrs my senior said he is from california suppose to be very rich,we talked and he pities my conditionas a single mother ..he recommened his friend to me and ask me to do forex trading.then he went to nigeria saying he got a job to finish ( he is an engineer),as soon as he arrives there he starts using his nigerian number,then he ask money from me saying his creditcard cannot be used in nigeria and it will take 2 months to link the card to local bank..so he asked for money through western union to a nigerian guy who he claims to be his worker, then he changed his phone to us number saying its cheaper..what do u guys think?
FTC Staff
May 07, 2018

In reply to by fina fina 88

If you send money by wire transfer to someone you met on line, you will probably lose the money.

 

Also, some scammers use people to help them transfer stolen money. They meet people online and create a relationship, then ask their new sweetheart to use her own bank account receive and transfer money.

 

If you do this for a scammer, your name is on the bank account and on the money transfer forms. If you get involved with one of these schemes, you could lose money and personal information, and you could get into legal trouble.

Cowboyup
July 12, 2018

In reply to by fina fina 88

Always go with your gut feeling. Ask a lot of questions. You will usually get different answers to same questions if you ask a lot
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